RE: Question11 Jan 2026 09:41
🛶 The Sunday Sermon of Revd OldSharedog
From the Villa of confusion Kefalos:
“On the Quantification of Vortices and Other Mysteries of the Faith
Beloved brethren, sistren, and long‑suffering holders of QBT,
We gather once more at the sacred waterside, where the Revd OldSharedog — your humble servant, part‑time theologian, full‑time paddler — has been conducting important scientific research. Namely:
Can a vortex be quantified when OldSharedog’s oars pull through the water?
Now, some of you may say, “Revd, that’s not science, that’s just you splashing about again.”
But I say unto you: where others see splashing, the faithful see data.
For when the Revd dips his mighty oars into the lake, the waters do not merely part — they swirl, they spin, they form vortices of such complexity that even the QBT algorithm pauses, strokes its metaphorical beard, and says, “Blimey, that’s non‑linear.”
And so the question arises:
Can the vortex be measured?
Can the turbulence be charted?
Can the swirl be quantified in a way that satisfies both physics and the QBT forum on a Sunday morning?
My children, the answer is simple:
Only if the share price stops bobbing long enough for anyone to get a reading.
For the vortex is like the market:
• It spins when you expect calm.
• It calms when you expect spin.
• And just when you think you’ve modelled it, OldSharedog rows past and ruins the dataset.
Some say the vortex represents uncertainty.
Others say it represents opportunity.
But the Revd says:
It represents the exact moment you realise you should’ve bought more at 0.7p.
Let us therefore embrace the vortex — not as a problem to be solved, but as a sign of movement, momentum, and the occasional splash in the face.
Go forth this week with faith, humour, and a towel.
Amen, and pass the oars.
DOG BLESS YOU ALL.
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