RE: Neo (ex-United H2) presentation PrimaryMarkets webinar 25 June 202522 Jul 2025 16:56
At last Thursday’s monthly gathering of the Jaywick Gentlemen’s Investment Society, held in the ever-damp pig shed of WalterMitty Hall, one Red Hornet—former possessor of precisely one share in Powerhouse energy —rose from his rickety chair and declared with great solemnity:
“Gentlemen, I have sold my stake.”
The room, usually only stirred by digestive murmurs and tepid sherry, fell into stunned silence.
“At a substantial loss,” he added, wiping a tear from his monocle. “But fear not. I have reinvested—wisely, boldly—into a private jet.”
Murmurs broke out. One man dropped a scotch egg.
Red raised a hand for silence and elaborated with the swagger of a man who'd read half a brochure once. “Not the metallic kind, no. Mine is... feathered. A chaffinch. Steroid-fuelled. Goes by Jetty-Boy. Can bench press a Sherman tank and fly me to Clacton before luncheon.”
This claim, which included supplementary nonsense about creatine pellets and anti-aircraft evasion maneuvers, was met with polite coughing and a motion to refill the port decanter.
It is, of course, patent drivel. Everyone at WalterMitty Hall knows Red Hornet sold at a loss to avoid the shame of holding, and made up the rest in a haze of ego and Red Bull. Still, on quiet mornings, if one listens carefully in Jaywick, one might just hear the faint chirp of a bird suffering from delusions of grandeur—and its owner doing likewise.