If the cap fits ...11 Aug 2024 15:08
Diary of Dr Henry Jeykll
I am a University educated, professionally qualified member of the financial business community. I love modelling (not the Airfix type) and have more cunning plans than Baldrick. I am of course Certified but apart from the old 'Pseudologia Fantastica' problem am mostly sane and rational. I am confident that my financial qualifications exempt me from 'LSE's Terms and Conditions of Use' - which can be safely ignored. I earn an impressive salary but spend far more than I should on my secret obsession.
Most days, I adopt one of my Edward Hyde aliases and frequent certain fringe websites. I pretend to be a simple but honest fool - I am actually neither - and post pitiful 'Woe is me' pleas for attention and sympathy.
I seek to mislead, depress and frighten the inexperienced by rubbishing the company in which many have invested their lifesavings. Hopefully my persistent bleating convinces 'Sheeple' investors that I am one of them and share their misery - rather than often being the cause.
By creating a miasma of doom & gloom I not only scare off potential new investors, but more importantly, encourage sales by existing shareholders. This depresses the SP and I buy heavily on the Dips as do my fellow travellers. (Note to self - Must check precise legal definition of 'Concert Party').
My real aim, of course, is to distract and antagonise more experienced investors who should perhaps know better. This ensures that I am the 'topic of the day' - not the company. The more I can consume the 'oxygen' on the Boards, the easier it is to smother any 'factual' posts by those irritating investors who think that project funding, OM Tranche 2, Navitas and FIG news, identity of possible new JV member(s), FID & Sanction are key to the success of Sea Lion and likely catalysts for the SP.
I actually find constructive and reasoned discussion difficult and original research just plain boring. Much prefer Spreadsheets to people!
In confidence, dear Diary, I am 100% certain that Sea Lion is viable, will be delivered on time, under budget and is already proceeding 'At a Pace'. My only fear is if one of my professional clients or colleagues or family members becomes interested in the company, reads my posts and joins up the dots. It could all get excruciatingly embarrassing. Oddly, I get a strange thrill from deliberately being so careless - or is it arrogant - with my own personal data.
Next day ......
This morning I woke up in bed to find a head shaped object beside me - severely beaten & disfigured and covered in a black waxy substance. On closer inspection - a used Drill Bit, I think - probably a subtle message from my Arch Nemesis Moody.
Perhaps it is time to create a new identity - this time it must be simple and memorable, dignified but totally unrelated to my real life persona. After several hours deep thought I think I have the perfect alias - Oddglob !
DEM