RE: Morning all9 Nov 2018 07:52
All,
My IPO goes live next week. You can get in at base level of only 1p per share valuing my company at around £5m. It will trade on AIM.
This will fully fund the company for at least 6 months. Or maybe December depending on my Christmas shopping list. At which point you will get the chance to buy more at an even bigger bargain price of 0.5p per share - half price so pile in!
This money will be used to explore my back garden for oil. I will make sure to twitter a few pictures of some store-bought engine oil spilled in the mud to get everyone excited and see the price shoot up to 0.9p - almost doubling in price! (unless of course you took part in the initial ipo... sorry - but I did say you should buy more!).
Damn that oil was expensive! I now need more funds... but to ensure my placing is "oversubscribed" I will offer it to new AND existing holders at a price of 0.3p this time! I mean that has got to triple in price hasn't it as original IPO was at 1p!
My MCAP is now close to £15m! But of course there are a lot more shares in issue... never mind.
Oh dear... turns out the oil was just not there after all... I did find a buried dog bone however which may belong to a dinosaur!
"Dear shareholders, due to ever expanding interest in my company there is a need for change. From next week the EPIC will be changed from "BOOB" to "YHBD. No this isn't to delete the bad history of the company and attract new BOOB investors, its just a name change. Really!"
Oh no... looks like the new company has run out of money as well... apologies we are delisting. Of course we would like to thank all loyal BOOB / YHBD shareholders for their support in our exploration programme. As with every investment there is always a risk. I will be thinking of you all whilst driving my shiny new car to my newly developed 8 bedroom mansion... you never know... there might be oil in the back garden!"... ...
What does YHBD stand for? "You Have Been Duped" of course!
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A summary of aim for those that didn't get it ;)