an oldie but a goodie. Diedrie's tale.12 Oct 2020 17:13
Well he didn't get much right in life did My Ronnie. Apart from marrying me and buying those BMN shares in 2013 he got most things wrong. Not a very tactile man. Though in truth I'm quite a cold woman myself. With him I was anyway. Ronnie used to joke that when I opened my mouth a light came on. He could be a card. Much given to mansplaining I'm afraid. In fact he once mansplained mansplaining to me and a few of the knitting group of the WI. 'Now mansplaining girls. Is when a MAN. Explains something to a WOMAN. In a patronising and condescending way. I can repeat that if you need me to.' Oh yes proper card he was. Banged on endlessly about Bushveld. Of course I know about them now but at the start I thought, oh here we go, wasting what little money we have on another crackpot scheme. I thought it was a cannabis farm. Actually, I hoped it was. All the youngsters seem to use it. Even Tyson. Well especially Tyson to be honest. He's the young lad we got in when the garden got a bit too much for Ronnie near the end. Strong as a paedophiles password is Tyson.
'Vandium Dierdrie, that's the future my girl' he'd say. Ronnie, not Tyson. 3 mines full of it Bushveld have got. Well they could have been the size of allotments for all that dopey idiot knew. So naturally I had to check it out myself and turned out he was on to something. 'It turns iron into steel and turns it into superman.' Bear in mind this was before the never proven unspecified poison that they never got to the bottom of started entering his system. So they say. Anyway, turns out they do have 3 massive mines full of top quality stuff. Vanadium. Not cannabis. Well me and Gladis from poison ivy cottage up the road had a look at it and found out about these VRFB's. Looked like the future to us. I asked Ronnie, being curious like, what do YOU think about VRFB's? 'Be okay with enough tomato sauce my love.' He said. He'd never heard of them. He was pretty ill by then in fairness. Once, as I gave him the coco I made him and insisted he drink every night. What about electrolyte then Ron?. 'Penicillin will sort that my love.' He said. Lemur? I asked. 'No love, get a cat.' It was a good funeral. So everbody says anway. I thought Dierdrie, you need to get away and cheer yourself up. I thought well, I've got my BMN shares to look after my retirement so I will book a cruise. So I did. Not cheap mind but I had Ronnie well insured. Had to buy an entire new summer wardrobe for Tyson though!