RE: RNS8 Aug 2025 15:48
Ah, Testpack — only you could take a throwaway quip about Brazilian breakfast habits (which, for the record, was a joke — you might want to look that word up) and inflate it into a full crime-scene analysis, complete with itemised fruit. The fact you genuinely believe “strawberries and granola” is a forensic victory really is the comedy gift that keeps on giving.
Then, out you shuffle with your beloved SPV anecdote from three years ago — polished, reheated and served as though it were a masterstroke of recall (spoiler: it isn’t). Nobody but you even remembers it happened, and yet here you are, clinging to it like it’s the Rosetta Stone of internet arguments.
Your pedantry is tireless, and yet — somehow — you still miss the point (repeatedly). You swing at jokes like a man trying to catch smoke, convinced you’ve landed the killer blow, only to fall over your own paragraphs.
And those literary comparisons you keep leaning into — part Dan Brown, part Dickens, part parish newsletter — all overwritten, under-edited and accidentally funny. You’re basically the pub quiz bloke who brings an encyclopaedia, loudly corrects the quizmaster, and then gets the first question wrong.
At this stage, you’re not even the antagonist anymore — you’re the comic relief. Which is fine, really. Every pantomime needs one.