Member Info for Tillywhiz

Just been to shore for some more rum for sunset celebrations and sneaky krevis nibbling maggots are climbing the rigging ! Man the planks and load the blunderbus ! Looking for full knots by 2pm

Can someone check the sails I think the bot flies have been cutting holes in them to slow us down ! Anyone good with a needle and cotton . Crank up the oars !

We are dragging anchor under the weight of feasting bot flies , clean the decks and remove the nasties ! No stopping this Galleon ! Also give yourself a pat on the back if managed to grab a fist full

The bot flies are out early !

Up and at it you salty sea dogs ! , Biblical prospects on the Horizon , just filled up a quality full English , you can keep your Veganuary I’m having Fleshebuary ! All hands on deck !

I swear I can hear the creak of the hammocks gently swaying as all invested lay there supping your nectar and reloading your muskets in anticipation for raising the anchor at 8. Nothing more satisfying after a plundering day a sea than polishing our huge sack of doubloons ! The bot flys are eerily quiet perhaps regrouping for a pincer manoeuvre

Time for all the shipmates to put your feet up have a rum and lick your lips at the size of our treasure chest ! I’m feeling a quality ambience aboard the Galleon .

Grumbling at 25% , and still an hour at sea , have some rum and cheer up !

Serious high seas , strap yourselves to the rigging , Full speed ahead !

Everyman to an oar , we want full knots to sunset , hoist anything to the mast , has anybody got Jordan’s Bra that should give us a couple of extra knots !

Grease the plank ! Bot fly on the starboard rigging

We are currently sailing at 15 knots and will increase to full speed by sunset , a beautiful selection of hors d oeuvres are being served in the shipmates galley kitchen and if you would like to look over the port side we are currently sailing past Bot fly island where sadly as you can see they are huddled together weeping with only vomit to lick , please don’t stare it’s rude , however perhaps glue various golden doubloons to your canon and in the words of Jim Bowen. ‘ look at what you could have won ‘ ! It’s a massive onwards n Bullseye upwards .

We have been out at sea for months aboard this Galleon crashing through wave after wave of negative feasting bot fly attacks even had there toxic diseased leader maggot man attempting to climb the rigging but all hopeless attacks failed ! This Palladium coated Galleon has a biblical treasure chest and a fine crew with the largest pulsating Canons ! Treasure island on the Horizon let’s pop another barrel of Rum !

Prepare the plank , Bot fly alert !

Come on own up who nailed there budgie smugglers to mast with ‘Tuesday ‘embroidered on the front ? And whos the bighead with ‘Beastkeeper ‘ on ! Reload the Canons !

The budgie smugglers on the mast are working ! More , get the wife’s crackers and bras up there ! Or your own crackers & bra if your that way inclined all investors welcome on this Bulging Galleon !

Raise the anchor and Hoist everything , main sail , spinnaker even your budgie smugglers lets have anything nailed to the mast for maximum knots ! Bathing in rum in celebration last night is all well and good but it gets in every orifice!

The rum bath is available aboard the Galleon think a few on here could do with a dip to loosen there bullets ! Plenty have increased there treasure chests today Enjoy ! well deserved after months aboard this Galleon , we sail at 8 at biblical Speed all shipmates to the oars on a breakfast of rum & amphetomenes .

Shiver me timbers ! , I’m aboard the Galleon laid in a bath of rum having my doubloons and Musket
Polished by a voluptuous vixen listening to the gentle lap of waves against her port side and started to feel charitable for the bot flies floating upside down scratching there worthless balls perhaps we could offer some scrag ends ,scrubbing the decks or removing barnacles but draw the line at buffing the canon .

All the krevis nibbling bot flies are quiet today as floating upside down after walking the plank , no room for negativity aboard this Galleon ! Serious doubloon polishing whilst bathing in Rum with a couple those fine Spanish temptresses will suffice tonight !