3 Tips to believe in yourself

Thursday, 24th May 2018 14:02 - by Ranjeet Singh

One of the most important lessons in life is to believe in yourself. That doesn’t mean being cocky or arrogant or thinking that you know best. In fact, all of that can work against you. However, having the confidence that you can achieve great things and knowing that you are capable of such a feat is the starting point to being successful in all that you do.

That’s because so much of doing anything in life is mental. Having a ‘positive mental attitude’ is a well-trodden path that most people would have heard of and yet most people don’t know how to achieve it. Now I should point out that I am no psychologist in this area but I think that I am qualified to share with you my own experiences – why? Because if they work for me then I know that they can work for you.

So, there are 3 things that you can do right now to help you build your belief system. I use these techniques every day and it has helped me to achieve great things in my life. As simple as they may sound, I think that without them I wouldn’t have been as successful as I am. I’m not the finished product and there are things which I strive to improve upon every day but you need a system to follow and this works for me which is why I’m sharing it with you.

1. Get Big Goals
2. Get Going
3. Get Comfortable doing uncomfortable things

The first thing that you need to do is set goals, and ideally big goals. If you don’t have a target then you have nothing to strive for and that means you will never push yourself. This is important in itself but what is even more important is the ‘art of winning’ because winning is psychological. If you set yourself a goal, big or small, and you achieve it, you will feel good about yourself. You will feel what it is to win.

Try and remember the last time that you fulfilled a goal – how did it make you feel? There are four main chemical releases from your brain (dopamine and endorphins are the two most common ones that you will have heard of). Similarly, when you are in danger the chemical cortisol is released to warn and protect you. This is completely involuntary and you have no control over this. It’s automated. So, if you win, you can’t help but feel good about yourself.

Remember it doesn’t matter what the goal is or what it’s about – just make sure that you set goals regularly and then you achieve them. Personally, I prefer to set myself massive goals which I rarely hit but that’s okay too because I have programmed my mind to knowing that I won’t achieve them. It’s the same principle as like aiming for the stars and reaching the moon.

However, when you first begin this journey and if you are lacking in confidence I would advise on setting small goals and then slowly building up from there. Remember it’s all about the winning to begin with. Win, win, win – then raise your target and win some more.

The second thing I would tell you to do is to ‘get going’. One of my greatest assets I believe is that I don’t procrastinate. I don’t like to think, I don’t like plan, I don’t even like to contemplate, I just like doing. I like to execute. Planning is over-rated. All of these business models and theories and ideas – none of that matters. What matters is that you get on and try. If you fail that’s okay. You shift your emphasis, you make a few adjustments, you tweak a couple of things, and you go again.

I wasn’t always like this of course and I wish somebody had given me this lesson many years ago so I am happy that I can share it with you, because it literally changed my life and I hope it can do the same for you.

Now I love to just learn on the job. It helps because I know how to measure risk and return and so the risk is always small. If I do something I don’t know too well, the risk is mitigated because I will do it in a small way until I am confident I am right in my approach. Other people mitigate risk by planning ahead but I think that’s over-rated and execution trumps planning all day long.

The final tip I would give is to get ‘comfortable doing the things that you are uncomfortable’ with. When you go to the gym your muscles ache because it’s the best way for your body to tell you that it’s uncomfortable. In the same way your brain muscle also needs a work out too. The litmus test is this – if you do not feel uncomfortable during you day at least once then you haven’t pushed yourself, and if you don’t push yourself, you will never improve.

Imagine standing up on a stage and giving a presentation to 200 people – would that you make feel uncomfortable? Yes? Good. So that’s why you should do it, and do it again, and keep it doing. Eventually you will find that it will no longer feel uncomfortable. That’s the trick.

Remember belief and confidence always stems from the same thing – ‘knowing’. The more knowledge that you have in something the more confident you will become. And what’s the best way to build your knowledge in anything – well that’s simple

1.  you need to set goals and know that you can achieve them

2. you spend more time doing and less time thinking, and

3.  you push yourself out of your comfort zone.

I hope that helps, in whatever you do.

Today’s video can be seen at https://youtu.be/zISY9PszLQ4

The Writer's views are their own, not a representation of London South East's. No advice is inferred or given. If you require financial advice, please seek an Independent Financial Adviser.