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Member Info for Mr.Leeson

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Member Since: Thu, 2nd Dec 2010

Number of Share Chat Posts (all time): 1,330
Number of Share Chat Posts (last 30 days): 14

Last Posted: Thu 21:29

Post Distribution over the last 30 days

Thu 21:29

Amid Amigos.....
Thu 14:46

just a tempoary technichal glitch.
Wed 20:47

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" Kids in the back seat cause accidents. Accidents in the back seat cause kids "


One night, an elderly lady stumbled into the police station with a black eye. She claimed she heard a noise in her back garden and went to investigate. The next thing she knew, she was hit in the eye and knocked out cold.

An officer was sent to her house to investigate. He returned half an hour later with a black eye.

"Did you get hit by the same person?" his Sergeant asked.

"No," he said. "I stepped on the same rake."
17 Nov '14

A man was wheeling himself frantically down the hall of the hospital in his wheelchair, just before his operation.

A nurse stopped him, and asked, "What's the matter?"

He said, "I heard the nurse say, It's a very simple operation. Don't worry, I'm sure it will be all right."

"She was just trying to comfort you, what's so frightening about that?"

"She wasn't talking to me. She was talking to the doctor!"
16 Nov '14

The doctor asked the man how he was feeling, and the 86-year-old said, "things are great, and I've never felt better! I now have a 20-year-old bride who is pregnant with my child. What do you think about that, doc?"

The doctor considered the question for a minute, and then began to tell a story.

"I have an older friend, much like you, who is an avid hunter and never misses a season. One day he was setting off to go hunting. In a bit of a hurry, he accidentally picked up his walking cane instead of his gun."

"As he neared a lake, he came across a very large male beaver sitting at the water's edge. He realized he left his gun at home, and so, he couldn't shoot the magnificent creature. Out of habit he raised his cane, aimed it at the animal as if it was his favorite hunting rifle, and yelled 'bang bang'. Miraculously, two shots rang out and the beaver fell dead."

"Now, what do you think of that?" asked the doctor.

The 86-year-old replied, "logic would strongly suggest that somebody else pumped a few rounds into that beaver."

The doctor replied, "my point exactly."

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